Breastfeeding and breathing

I honestly have had a hard time writing this post. Before I was even pregnant, I always knew that I wanted to breastfeed my babies. There was no question about it! But, I never realized how hard it can be :( I know that breast milk is the absolute best thing for Luke and I plan on continuing to breastfeed, but to be honest, I am struggling. He latched on right away which was great, but my little man is hungry ALL THE TIME!! I don't feel like I am producing enough milk for him! There are times when he will be so hungry that he goes crazy trying to latch on, moving his head back and fourth so fast and hard that is scares me that he will hurt his head! Nick and I call him, "Wild Man" because he goes crazy!

I try to pump a few times a day to help with my supply. I don't know if it has helped or not. We have given Luke a bottle in the middle of the night (with my breast milk) after he nurses for a little while, but is still hungry ( oh and I don't need to hear that it is not good to give a baby a bottle so early, and that it will interfere with breastfeeding, I've already heard it, and frankly I am doing what I feel is best for Luke and Me) That is what I am struggling with most. I DON'T want to have to give him a bottle at night. I want to exclusively breast feed, but there are times when I know he needs more. Ugh...I never knew it could be so hard, but I am doing to do whatever it takes to do what is best for Luke!

On to my next topic.....breathing.... I never knew babies can have such weird breathing patterns. I was not told this at the hospital, or anywhere for that matter! Luke is almost 3 weeks old and he still has certain breathing patterns depending on what he is doing. If he is awake he has a normal breathing pattern, if he is asleep, but not in a deep sleep his breathing is crazy! There are even times when he will hold his breath for about 5 seconds....talk about giving a new mama a heart attack! When he is deep asleep he will breath soft and normal. I know there is not a manual when it comes to being a mom, but boy I am one big stress ball! I knew that I worried a lot before having Luke, but I have reached my all time high now! SO stressful!

* I wrote this post a couple days ago, and I have to say breastfeeding has gotten a little easier in the last couple of days. I know that it takes time, and I am proud to say that I have stuck with it and am feeling a little more confident with his feedings! Thank Goodness! Being a new Mama is stressful and I am glad that the little "bumps" are starting to smooth out a bit!

Happy Friday everyone! We are hoping for a nice relaxing weekend! Its supposed to rain here in Phoenix.... and we all know that we LOVE us some rain!!

~Breanna